So that is basically my entire post...all in the title.
The End.
Other working title: One should not have alarm on cell phone be the same as the ringtone on said cell phone, lest one sleep through alarm while dreaming their phone was ringing.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Monday, November 14, 2011
Dear Hair
Dear Hair,
I know we have a love/hate relationship. I know you refuse to be straight and untangly. I've accepted that and decided to love you anyway. I know we hit the mother load while I was pregnant. Soft, full and generally fuss free. And then you decided bald might be a good look after pregnancy. I was honestly quite worried about the number of times you clogged my drain (and if my husband still liked me after he had to clean said drain). I also happen to know you are rather enjoying this little stage of uncertainty we have here. To be wavy or curly? To be curly or kinky? To be dreds or not? Personally, I would just prefer you pick one. Preferably wavy. Preferably not dreds.
While I understand you have your own agenda I have a favor to ask. Please stop being nice to me only when I'm getting ready to get you cut. As in, "I will cut you!". But not because I want to hurt you, only because you need it. Do you KNOW I am making an appointment today? Do you KNOW I've decided to not cut you short?
Please stop being nice to me. It's freaking me out.
Me
I know we have a love/hate relationship. I know you refuse to be straight and untangly. I've accepted that and decided to love you anyway. I know we hit the mother load while I was pregnant. Soft, full and generally fuss free. And then you decided bald might be a good look after pregnancy. I was honestly quite worried about the number of times you clogged my drain (and if my husband still liked me after he had to clean said drain). I also happen to know you are rather enjoying this little stage of uncertainty we have here. To be wavy or curly? To be curly or kinky? To be dreds or not? Personally, I would just prefer you pick one. Preferably wavy. Preferably not dreds.
While I understand you have your own agenda I have a favor to ask. Please stop being nice to me only when I'm getting ready to get you cut. As in, "I will cut you!". But not because I want to hurt you, only because you need it. Do you KNOW I am making an appointment today? Do you KNOW I've decided to not cut you short?
Please stop being nice to me. It's freaking me out.
Me
First Time for Everything
Dear Little Boy,
You are going to the doctor today. Who cares, you say? No biggie, you say. Well. Today is the first time you are going that wasn't already scheduled. I'm not going to put on here why you are going as that is too much like showing your future girlfriends bathtub pictures (which I TOTALLY intend to do). Uh, yeah, I'm THAT mom.
Worst part is I can't even take you, your daddy has to. It's OK, I generally get all the shot visits. But what concerns me is, what does this say about us as parents? You are almost 11 months old, I haven't even CALLED the pediatrician before. Now, the lactation consultant is a different story...she was on speed dial. Does this mean we are just good, laid-back parents? Or are we too nonchalant? Based on the instruction manual I gave your new sitter today, I'm not sure either of them fit.
I should have put you in a cuter outfit this morning. And I'll have to make sure daddy takes a picture to commemorate your first sick visit! Hmmm, I think I know who is sick here.
But I love you!
Mommy
You are going to the doctor today. Who cares, you say? No biggie, you say. Well. Today is the first time you are going that wasn't already scheduled. I'm not going to put on here why you are going as that is too much like showing your future girlfriends bathtub pictures (which I TOTALLY intend to do). Uh, yeah, I'm THAT mom.
Worst part is I can't even take you, your daddy has to. It's OK, I generally get all the shot visits. But what concerns me is, what does this say about us as parents? You are almost 11 months old, I haven't even CALLED the pediatrician before. Now, the lactation consultant is a different story...she was on speed dial. Does this mean we are just good, laid-back parents? Or are we too nonchalant? Based on the instruction manual I gave your new sitter today, I'm not sure either of them fit.
I should have put you in a cuter outfit this morning. And I'll have to make sure daddy takes a picture to commemorate your first sick visit! Hmmm, I think I know who is sick here.
But I love you!
Mommy
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Used to
Used to be that America's Funniest Home Videos would put me in a good mood, even after a day like today.
Used to be. What happened?
Used to be. What happened?
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Oh yeah, this too
Dear Little Boy,
I left out a few things, which inevitably were the things that made me decide to write the post to begin with. And of course they are how I know you are mine, since I know me best.
10. You sometimes snort when you laugh. I'm not proud of this.
11. Your body jerks when you are falling asleep. Sorry...
The good news is that your future wife can always say, "at least you come by it honestly". I may or may not use that almost daily with your dad.
Love you!
Mommy
P.S. Please stop waking up at 4 AM.
I left out a few things, which inevitably were the things that made me decide to write the post to begin with. And of course they are how I know you are mine, since I know me best.
10. You sometimes snort when you laugh. I'm not proud of this.
11. Your body jerks when you are falling asleep. Sorry...
The good news is that your future wife can always say, "at least you come by it honestly". I may or may not use that almost daily with your dad.
Love you!
Mommy
P.S. Please stop waking up at 4 AM.
Friday, November 4, 2011
For Future Reference
Dear Little Boy,
There will come a time in your life when you will not like us very much as parents. There may even come a time when you wonder how you came from this family. I still have that wonder for myself sometimes. So much so that I confronted my mother about whether or not I was adopted. I was in college. I may or may not still have lingering doubt.
But rest assured you are ours. Something happened the other night that made me tell your daddy, "Wow, he is SO my kid". So I started thinking of all the ways I know you are mine. And his. But mostly mine.
1. That whole pregnancy/labor thing. Yeah, won't soon forget that part.
2. You have curly hair. I'm sorry.
3. You have blue eyes. You are not allowed to use these to get what you want from me or any other woman.
4. You like to sleep on your stomach. I feel ya on that one.
5. You like to sleep contorted or with one leg bent. Your future wife may hate me for that one.
6. You like the blanket to be beside your face when you sleep. I love covers.
7. You like to go for walks.
8. Stubborn much?
9. Short legs, long torso. Haven't figure out what that is good for, yet.
I can't leave your dad out. Just a few ways you are like him.
1. You both like boobies.
2. So. Freaking. Cute.
3. Mirrors are your friend.
4. You have a laid back personality.
5. You are kind to strangers.
6. Full of energy.
I'm sure more stuff will emerge later. I'll claim all the good stuff. :)
Love you,
Mommy
There will come a time in your life when you will not like us very much as parents. There may even come a time when you wonder how you came from this family. I still have that wonder for myself sometimes. So much so that I confronted my mother about whether or not I was adopted. I was in college. I may or may not still have lingering doubt.
But rest assured you are ours. Something happened the other night that made me tell your daddy, "Wow, he is SO my kid". So I started thinking of all the ways I know you are mine. And his. But mostly mine.
1. That whole pregnancy/labor thing. Yeah, won't soon forget that part.
2. You have curly hair. I'm sorry.
3. You have blue eyes. You are not allowed to use these to get what you want from me or any other woman.
4. You like to sleep on your stomach. I feel ya on that one.
5. You like to sleep contorted or with one leg bent. Your future wife may hate me for that one.
6. You like the blanket to be beside your face when you sleep. I love covers.
7. You like to go for walks.
8. Stubborn much?
9. Short legs, long torso. Haven't figure out what that is good for, yet.
I can't leave your dad out. Just a few ways you are like him.
1. You both like boobies.
2. So. Freaking. Cute.
3. Mirrors are your friend.
4. You have a laid back personality.
5. You are kind to strangers.
6. Full of energy.
I'm sure more stuff will emerge later. I'll claim all the good stuff. :)
Love you,
Mommy
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Family Dynamics
I have an odd family dynamic. I'd explain it, but it doesn't really matter for purposes of this post. Here is the Clff Notes version.
I have an older brother and younger sister. My brother is 1.5 yrs older than me, my sister 5.5 yrs younger. My brother and I have the same father, sister and I have different. Never in the world could you imagine three children who are so completely and utterly different from each other.
I don't know my dad. I know who he is, but I don't really know him. He is a voice on the end of the phone. I don't know how he takes his coffee. I don't know his favorite type of movies. I don't know what he likes to do on Sunday afternoons. What is strange to me, however, are traits that my brother and I have of his. Neither of us spent much time with him growing up. Summers sometimes but never anything I can recall. Camping when I graduated high school but I was molded by then. My dad is a good man, this post isn't about knocking him.
My brother has his laugh. And he looks just like him. I mean, just like him. I have my dad's body. Which isn't that great, given that my mom is super skinny. I have his hair. I have his temperment.
This post isn't about feeling bad for me either, I rarely feel bad about my family dynamic. Sure, there are times I wish I had what my friends had, but I usually didn't feel like I was missing much. I was more independent than my brother, though. And I think boys need their fathers more than girls do.
I remember telling Brad long before we had kids that I would never be jealous of his relationship with our kids, especially if we had a girl. Every girl needs a strong man in her life, and if it isn't her father, then it will usually be someone else.
So for any woman who reads this, build your husbands up. Let them be the man. Let them lead the house. Let them skirt responsibility sometimes, if it means they are spending time with the kids or even you!
For the men reading, build your wives up. Tell her she is beautiful, even if she hasn't had a shower. Do the dishes for her one night so she can relax. Order out so you can all spend time together.
If there is one thing I've learned in my short time as a parent, its that we should be the parents we always said we would be.
Give hugs. Give kisses. Let them make a mess. Take them to the park. Let them be kids. And let each other be human. We all make mistakes, but we are a family. And families rule.
I have an older brother and younger sister. My brother is 1.5 yrs older than me, my sister 5.5 yrs younger. My brother and I have the same father, sister and I have different. Never in the world could you imagine three children who are so completely and utterly different from each other.
I don't know my dad. I know who he is, but I don't really know him. He is a voice on the end of the phone. I don't know how he takes his coffee. I don't know his favorite type of movies. I don't know what he likes to do on Sunday afternoons. What is strange to me, however, are traits that my brother and I have of his. Neither of us spent much time with him growing up. Summers sometimes but never anything I can recall. Camping when I graduated high school but I was molded by then. My dad is a good man, this post isn't about knocking him.
My brother has his laugh. And he looks just like him. I mean, just like him. I have my dad's body. Which isn't that great, given that my mom is super skinny. I have his hair. I have his temperment.
This post isn't about feeling bad for me either, I rarely feel bad about my family dynamic. Sure, there are times I wish I had what my friends had, but I usually didn't feel like I was missing much. I was more independent than my brother, though. And I think boys need their fathers more than girls do.
I remember telling Brad long before we had kids that I would never be jealous of his relationship with our kids, especially if we had a girl. Every girl needs a strong man in her life, and if it isn't her father, then it will usually be someone else.
So for any woman who reads this, build your husbands up. Let them be the man. Let them lead the house. Let them skirt responsibility sometimes, if it means they are spending time with the kids or even you!
For the men reading, build your wives up. Tell her she is beautiful, even if she hasn't had a shower. Do the dishes for her one night so she can relax. Order out so you can all spend time together.
If there is one thing I've learned in my short time as a parent, its that we should be the parents we always said we would be.
Give hugs. Give kisses. Let them make a mess. Take them to the park. Let them be kids. And let each other be human. We all make mistakes, but we are a family. And families rule.
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