Irony: a definition

Dictionary.com defines irony as:

1. the use of words to convey a meaning that is opposite its literal meaning.
2. a technique of indicating, as through character or plot development, an intention or attitude opposite to that which is actually or ostensibly stated.

Or as I would like to use it today...

"an outcome of events contrary to what was, or might have been, expected."

Please allow me to offer an illustration.

Last week I got my car inspected. As I am normally late, the new rules in NC make it much harder to get your registration/insurance if you don't do this on time. The very nice gentleman passed me, even though my tires were...lacking. He actually told me that I needed new tires. This I know. I also need money for tires. Regardless...my wonderful husband made an appointment for me to get new tires this morning. I was so proud of myself because I was actually going to be on time. Actually early. I allowed enough time for slow drivers, long stop lights, even school buses. However, I did not allow enough time for a flat tire. Because surely that wouldn't happen. So, I am driving down my driveway, thinking...."hmmm, something doesn't sound quite right". (Did I mention I worry too much?) I pulled over and checked the tires because I have a horrible fear of having flat tires, even though I've had enough to get over that fear. Lo and behold, completely flat tire.

I called my husband, told him the situation, and he laughed. Oh, I forgot to mention it was raining. And he is laughing! He stopped when he realized he would have to come change it because even though I am independent, I'm not the most coordinated and I do rely on men for tire changing. Plus, it is REALLY hard to get those lugnuts off.

I thought I would help him out before he got there. I took out the spare tire, the manual (I'm a girl, we read directions) and tried to get the jack out...in the rain. He got there about 10 minutes later and promptly put them all back in the trunk and told me to drive back to the house. Wait...I'm trying to help and you tell me to drive back home? HUH? Oh, you mean you don't want to change the tire in the current of water...makes sense.

Anyway, finally got the tire off and put the spare on (he did, not me) and guess what...its almost flat. Yes, I should have been named Murphy. But all is well. The tires are new and the spare is full of air...for next time the flat tire comes.