One thing I wasn't prepared for in becoming a parent is the internalization of fear and pain.  I never thought hearing or reading of another child's death or suffering would cause me to weep as uncontrollably as I do.  I have always had a hard time with children who suffer, but since I had little boy I literally cannot read the article, or watch the news story.  No one warned me.  No one prepared me.  No one told me that I would worry every day that I may not see him grow up.  
I wonder if every parent has that worry.  In these uncertain times I wonder how we can't.  
Given what happened last week, how can we not?
Today is little boy's birthday.  It's a time for celebration and letting him eat more sugar than ever before.  It's a time for me to take the day off work just to spend time with him.  
I know all parents hugged their children tightly upon hearing the news Friday.  My husband and I often say, "if nothing else, he will know he is loved."  
In this time of uncertainty - isn't that the greatest gift we have to give?  
Little boy, even when things don't go according to plan, I will love you.  I will mess up many things. I will do many things wrong. But I pray you will always know how much you are loved.  
 
 
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