Kids, never tell anyone where you heard that. m'kay?
I had dental surgery Tuesday. And as someone so eloquently put it this morning, "Yeah, you are still looking chipmunkish. But don't worry, chipmunks are cute." This person has clearly never seen Alvin and the Chipmunks. Nor has she looked like a chipmunk. Yes, chipmunks are cute. When they are outside running away from my dog. Not when I am compared to one.
It takes a lot of Novocaine to get me good and numb. Seriously, I had 6 shots. I'd like to say that I have a high pain tolerance but I think it is finally time to admit that I don't. I had a good run of it though. Finally the truth is out. I'm a big baby. You'd think after 20 years of painful, um...times of the month, I'd be all good and scarred and strong. Nope. I still cry when my finger gets shut in the drawer. I lament over cutting myself while shaving. Yes, Brad, I do still shave. Sometimes.
Well, two days after my surgery I am still hurting. And that is where the drugs come in. It's only Ibuprofen, but it is good, and I like it.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Monday, December 5, 2011
All I Want for Christmas
Am I the only one who hates to give people a list of things to get me for Christmas? Oh? I am? Oh well. I hate it. If you are determined to get me something then you probably should have thought about what it was before having to ask me what I wanted. :)
So here is my list, in all it's glory.
1. Free time.
2. A clean house.
3. NO. LAUNDRY.
4. Enough money so I don't have to work.
5. A new kitchen.
6. New windows.
7. 10 lbs of weight loss.
8. The ability to run for 20 minutes without dying or requiring hospitalization.
9. A personal chef.
10. World peace.
Can you help me out with any of those?
So here is my list, in all it's glory.
1. Free time.
2. A clean house.
3. NO. LAUNDRY.
4. Enough money so I don't have to work.
5. A new kitchen.
6. New windows.
7. 10 lbs of weight loss.
8. The ability to run for 20 minutes without dying or requiring hospitalization.
9. A personal chef.
10. World peace.
Can you help me out with any of those?
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
I think it's time to change my ringtone, or get more sleep
So that is basically my entire post...all in the title.
The End.
Other working title: One should not have alarm on cell phone be the same as the ringtone on said cell phone, lest one sleep through alarm while dreaming their phone was ringing.
The End.
Other working title: One should not have alarm on cell phone be the same as the ringtone on said cell phone, lest one sleep through alarm while dreaming their phone was ringing.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Dear Hair
Dear Hair,
I know we have a love/hate relationship. I know you refuse to be straight and untangly. I've accepted that and decided to love you anyway. I know we hit the mother load while I was pregnant. Soft, full and generally fuss free. And then you decided bald might be a good look after pregnancy. I was honestly quite worried about the number of times you clogged my drain (and if my husband still liked me after he had to clean said drain). I also happen to know you are rather enjoying this little stage of uncertainty we have here. To be wavy or curly? To be curly or kinky? To be dreds or not? Personally, I would just prefer you pick one. Preferably wavy. Preferably not dreds.
While I understand you have your own agenda I have a favor to ask. Please stop being nice to me only when I'm getting ready to get you cut. As in, "I will cut you!". But not because I want to hurt you, only because you need it. Do you KNOW I am making an appointment today? Do you KNOW I've decided to not cut you short?
Please stop being nice to me. It's freaking me out.
Me
I know we have a love/hate relationship. I know you refuse to be straight and untangly. I've accepted that and decided to love you anyway. I know we hit the mother load while I was pregnant. Soft, full and generally fuss free. And then you decided bald might be a good look after pregnancy. I was honestly quite worried about the number of times you clogged my drain (and if my husband still liked me after he had to clean said drain). I also happen to know you are rather enjoying this little stage of uncertainty we have here. To be wavy or curly? To be curly or kinky? To be dreds or not? Personally, I would just prefer you pick one. Preferably wavy. Preferably not dreds.
While I understand you have your own agenda I have a favor to ask. Please stop being nice to me only when I'm getting ready to get you cut. As in, "I will cut you!". But not because I want to hurt you, only because you need it. Do you KNOW I am making an appointment today? Do you KNOW I've decided to not cut you short?
Please stop being nice to me. It's freaking me out.
Me
First Time for Everything
Dear Little Boy,
You are going to the doctor today. Who cares, you say? No biggie, you say. Well. Today is the first time you are going that wasn't already scheduled. I'm not going to put on here why you are going as that is too much like showing your future girlfriends bathtub pictures (which I TOTALLY intend to do). Uh, yeah, I'm THAT mom.
Worst part is I can't even take you, your daddy has to. It's OK, I generally get all the shot visits. But what concerns me is, what does this say about us as parents? You are almost 11 months old, I haven't even CALLED the pediatrician before. Now, the lactation consultant is a different story...she was on speed dial. Does this mean we are just good, laid-back parents? Or are we too nonchalant? Based on the instruction manual I gave your new sitter today, I'm not sure either of them fit.
I should have put you in a cuter outfit this morning. And I'll have to make sure daddy takes a picture to commemorate your first sick visit! Hmmm, I think I know who is sick here.
But I love you!
Mommy
You are going to the doctor today. Who cares, you say? No biggie, you say. Well. Today is the first time you are going that wasn't already scheduled. I'm not going to put on here why you are going as that is too much like showing your future girlfriends bathtub pictures (which I TOTALLY intend to do). Uh, yeah, I'm THAT mom.
Worst part is I can't even take you, your daddy has to. It's OK, I generally get all the shot visits. But what concerns me is, what does this say about us as parents? You are almost 11 months old, I haven't even CALLED the pediatrician before. Now, the lactation consultant is a different story...she was on speed dial. Does this mean we are just good, laid-back parents? Or are we too nonchalant? Based on the instruction manual I gave your new sitter today, I'm not sure either of them fit.
I should have put you in a cuter outfit this morning. And I'll have to make sure daddy takes a picture to commemorate your first sick visit! Hmmm, I think I know who is sick here.
But I love you!
Mommy
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Used to
Used to be that America's Funniest Home Videos would put me in a good mood, even after a day like today.
Used to be. What happened?
Used to be. What happened?
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Oh yeah, this too
Dear Little Boy,
I left out a few things, which inevitably were the things that made me decide to write the post to begin with. And of course they are how I know you are mine, since I know me best.
10. You sometimes snort when you laugh. I'm not proud of this.
11. Your body jerks when you are falling asleep. Sorry...
The good news is that your future wife can always say, "at least you come by it honestly". I may or may not use that almost daily with your dad.
Love you!
Mommy
P.S. Please stop waking up at 4 AM.
I left out a few things, which inevitably were the things that made me decide to write the post to begin with. And of course they are how I know you are mine, since I know me best.
10. You sometimes snort when you laugh. I'm not proud of this.
11. Your body jerks when you are falling asleep. Sorry...
The good news is that your future wife can always say, "at least you come by it honestly". I may or may not use that almost daily with your dad.
Love you!
Mommy
P.S. Please stop waking up at 4 AM.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)