Small one before a bigger one

I've been intimidated by the next post I want to write...so like any good person, I'm procrastinating.  Please don't have any illusions of grandeur, after all it is just me.

To pass the time, I thought I would tell you something about my first baby, Maddie.  We've had Maddie for almost 13 years, adopted her when she was a puppy.  She is an ornery old lady, but we love her.  I took her to the vet yesterday for a check up.  The vet said she was one of the healthiest 90 year olds he's ever met.  We know it will be a very difficult day when we have to say goodbye.  However, there are times that she tries to change my mind about that.

Case in point, yesterday.  I had five $1 bills in my purse.  They were in my purse because I was too busy (read:  too lazy) to put them in my wallet.  Today I had four $1 bills in my purse.  I found my purse turned over with many contents removed, including the dollar bills.  Sadly, it isn't the first time.  But last time it was a $20 dollar bill and it only had teeth marks in it.

Maddie decided it would be fun to see how money tasted.  I'm betting not great, but apparently better than the $20 bill.

My first riddle

What do you get when you have too many days of snow/rain/sleet?  A wet ground.

What do you get when said wet ground no longer allows the drainage spout to move water away from the house?  A clogged drainage spout.

What do you get when said clogged drainage spout has no where to put the tons of water still coming down?  Water in your heating ducts.  (don't ask me how that happens)

What do you get when said water in heating ducts is in said heating ducts?  A funny noise that sounds like there is lava gurgling inside your walls whenever the heat turns on.

What do you get when you realize the problem is too much rain/sleet/snow, a wet ground, a clogged drainage spout, water backed up into heating ducts, and the gurgling effect?

A husband who is a good sport about having his picture taken while his wife has been indiscreetly laughing at the amount of mud flying from clearing the clogged drainage spout. 

Peace and Quiet

I decided to be a good wife and listen to my husband for once. It is snowing today and instead of putting my job before myself, I decided to go in late. Actually, it was only after my boss called me and told me to go in late that I decided it was ok.

So I'm sitting in my kitchen diligently working. My dogs are standing beside me, diligently whining. Incessantly whining. Holy crap why are they whining so much? PLEASE STOP THE WHINING! And if it isn't the whining they are walking underneath my legs, back and forth, back and forth. Honestly, I wonder if people are ever committed for this level of insanity.

I let them outside (they LOVE the snow). I let them inside (they love the heat). I strongly discourage them from whining. Just go lay down! There are beds all over the house for nap taking - do what you do all day when we aren't here.

Then it hit me...they just want to be close to me. So I went downstairs, got two beds and within seconds, this was the result.

 

It's nice to be right.  But it is better to be loved.

Accountability-ish

One of my best friends asked me to go all Jillian Michaels on her. I admit, I have failed at that. But it was fun for a day or two. So now I need that bit of accountability. Not to keep her in line, she has too much self-motivation, but for me!

For Christmas Brad bought me the Wii Active. I loved it...at first. Then about 10 minutes later it was more of a love/hate relationship. The next day was all hate. But I tried to stick with it and did well for a few weeks (read: over a week). Then I worked third shift and used that for all my excuses to not do anything. And I mean anything. I also blame no coffee for a week, but I'm trying to move past it.

I have a rekindled love with Wii Active. I'm going to give it another shot. So I need you guys (ok, you two) to keep me accountable.

The Silver Lining

I have realized there is a silver lining to working 3rd shift. For starters, email doesn't rule your day. You have all your emails ready for you when you get in. You can reply to each one without having to worry about what is coming into your mailbox next. Also, there are much fewer interruptions. You can actually complete a task. Novel idea, I know. And most importantly, those people who you don't really like but you have to be nice to because you are in HR, they aren't here.

Nights are for...

I am working 3rd shift this week. Yes, I am tired. Yes, I have a new-found respect for people who work 3rd shift. Yes, I realize I am only on night #2. Yes, it does suck.

I've realized how good I have it. Sure, I work more hours than I should, but at the end of it I get to come home and eat, clean, do whatever I want. Ususally eat. Always eat.

Regardless, I have tried to think of things Nights are for...besides working.

*Sleeping (oh, how I miss my bed)
*Watching TV. I don't even do this much, but I could, and that is the point.
*Dreaming (while sleeping)
*Snuggling on the couch
*Reading (things other than email)
*Going out to dinner
*Calling friends
*Sleeping
*Late-night Target runs
*Letting your dog jump up on the bed with you before your husband joins. I really do this so his side of the bed will be warm when he gets in. See, I'm sweet like that.
*And sleeping.

I'm sure there are tons I am forgetting, but I'm tired and surprised I can even get that many out. I also think I should change the name of my blog to www.listymclisterson.blogspot.com. Apparently I have a thing for lists...and sleeping.

You know how I know...

Let me preface this by saying I love my husband. But he is, well...kinda girlie. Not girlie as in "ohhh, lets watch a romantic comedy tonight" or "I need to go to the bathroom, want to go too?" (ladies, you know we have all done that). He is girlie in a stranger sense of the word. I ask him if I look ok, if I match...and I trust him when he says no. He is a much better cook than I am. He is a MUCH better dresser than I am. He loves to shop. L.O.V.E.S. to shop. Grocery store, Home Depot, TJMaxx, doesn't really matter. I hate to shop. So often times he will say something particularly girlie, like "you know, the Backstreet Boys weren't so bad". Kidding. He would never say that. But he will occasionally make comments that illicit that completely inappropriate comment from me..."you know how I know you're gay". It's horrible, I know. And I've tried to stop. But sometimes I can't help myself.

Well, in honor of my extremely masculine and hot husband, "you know how I know"...I'm old?

1. Sleeping in a king size bed doesn't really sound like a bad idea anymore.
2. I no longer make my plans for New Year's Eve in April, right after spring break. I'm lucky to make plans at all.
3. Things really do creak when I stand up.
4. It is difficult not to let out a slight 'grunt' (for lack of a better word) when I stand up.
5. It is sometimes difficult to hold in a fart.
6. I would rather bring my lunch than go out to eat.
7. I no longer get lots of Christmas presents.
8. Birthdays kinda suck.
9. The majority of my decisions are based on what time I can go to bed.
10. I wonder what the hell the radio stations are playing and who the heck listens to that crap.
11. 90's music is on the Oldies station.
12. The teenage stars of our youth are either in rehab, play someone's mom/dad on tv, or are a cashier at the local grocery store.
13. I worry about how much fiber I get (this could be the cause of #5).
14. I no longer get carded.
15. People call me...ma'am.
16. I OFTEN forget my age.
17. I own and have used a crock pot.
18. I can understand what my mother is talking about.

It's a sad day. If the first step is admitting a I have a problem and the first stage is denial, then I don't know what the heck you are talking about, I am not old and will go out every night for the next week to prove it. That is where the I see the problem.