He says he is sorry

I have this BFF.  She is pretty cool.  We've only had one fight that I can think of and it was because I wouldn't buy some stupid pants that she said looked good on me but I didn't like them.  She was brave enough to take me shopping to begin with because I absolutely hate it. 

There is a problem though.  Apparently my son isn't fond of her.  Every time he sees her, he cries.  Every. Time.  We can't figure out why.  Was it because she had gum?  I don't know?  Was it because she had a sucker in her mouth?  I don't know.  Is it her daughter?  I don't know.  Was it her dark hair?  I don't know.  You get the point. 

This weekend we met them at the park down the street.  Little boy had just woken up and eaten so he had everything necessary to make him happy.  I was nervous.  My little boy needs to like my BFF.  I will use her to babysit.  He must have heard my pleas because he didn't cry! 

So he threw up on her instead.  Maybe he got it out of his system.  (pun intended)

Do as I say, Not as I do

My mother-in-law was extremely sweet to me this weekend and brought me a cake for my birthday.  I'm not supposed to eat a lot of gluten which bascially means it is all I want to eat.  Preferably in the form of cakes and cookies.  And brownies.  And bread with butter. 

I put the cake (in its box) into the oven to keep it fresher.  I'm not sure if it is true the oven will keep it fresher than the counter.  Anyway, I went to cook my gluten free lunch and turned the oven on to 400.  I didn't remember the cake until the buzzer went off telling me it had reached temperature. 

Cakes don't smell very good after that type of traumatic event.  So always look in the oven before you turn it on.

And if anyone wants to buy me a cake since I ruined this one, that would be might nice of you!  I'll take chocolate. 

The first of many

Dear Little Boy,

This has been an interesting week!  You had your first bloody nose.  I'm not gonna lie.  I cried a bit.  Apparently you did not.  You are such a vivacious little boy that you got a little too excited with one of your toys and whacked yourself in the nose.  Needless to say that toy has since been put up.  Your nose was still swollen a bit when I got home and I had the yucky task of getting dried blood out the next morning.  All is well now and somehow  I  you survived.  I have to keep telling myself you are probably going to have a few of those during your childhood.  My dad told me yesterday that I was a daredevil when I was young.  Couple that with your dad's natural inquisitiveness and we may have created an Emergency Room regular.

You are sprouting two new teeth which have caused me considerable pain, joy, and bleeding.  How, do you ask, are all three possible at the same time?  Well, I shall tell you.  First, you like to bite.  I understand your gums are hurting and you need relief.  I am not to be that relief.  Saturday morning you needed a lot of relief which led to me crying.  Mostly out of frustration and tiredness, but crying nonetheless.  Your daddy came and got you and was taking you in another room when you clearly and unmistakably called out "mama".  Oh.  My.  Goodness.  Sweetest words I ever heard.  Well, sweetest word.  Instantly I felt better.  Until you bit me again.

Sunday was my bday and your 7 month bday!  It is just you and me all week because your daddy went out of town for work.  Maybe you missed him, but you bit me again and made me bleed.  I'd finally had enough.  I called the lactation consultant and she gave me some helpful ideas and I'm going to try them out.  Hopefully we can nip this in the bud as I'm not mentally ready to stop nursing. 

So I am going to make a deal with you.  You stop biting, and I'll keep feeding.  It is a win-win.

I love you,
Mommy

Overdue

Dear Little Boy,

This letter is late because your mommy is slack.  I'll try to be better.

You're growing up so fast.  You'll be 7 months old this weekend.  Someone once said that life before children was black and white and with children everything was in color.  I can completely understand what they mean.  Life before you was good, but it wasn't complete. 

You have two teeth now!  You got your first one on Father's Day.  I wish I would have known that was going to happen and I wouldn't have bought your daddy a present.  Help me out next time.  You're also sitting up on your own really well!  Of course,  you fell over twice today so it is a work in progress. 

Right now your favorite toys are numerous!  You love the remote, mommy's very expensive phone, an inexpensive teether that is awesome, mommy's hair, and tags.  You have this adorable snorty thing you do when you get really excited.  It's a cross between lamaze breathing sounds and a pig.  Oh, and you do snort sometimes...just like your mommy. 

You love Lucy.  She is your favorite and you will stop what you are doing anytime she walks in the room.  She gets great smiles from you and she loves you right back.  You also flirt with every woman you see.  Anytime we go out to eat or are in line anywhere you will inevitably smile for all the women. 

You've already been to your first (and second) baseball game.  I'm not sure what you think of it yet.  But you did get a fly ball on your first trip!  I've never gotten one so that is a huge deal.  You've also been to the beach!  There was a faceplant in the sand so I think the pool was more your speed.

I like to take you for walks after work.  You love walks.  You generally love being outside and I love spending that time with you.  It's our special thing. 

And do you know what?  You make me special, little boy.

I love you,
Mommy

Never Ever

I recently learned you should never say never.  Unless, of course, you are saying never to say that you will never say never. 

Then I think you are safe.

Stepping onto my Soapbox

I'm not a fan of beauty pageants or scholarship programs or whatever they like to call themselves.  I believe it comes from a lifetime of no talent and awkward looks.  However, I supported my sister in beauty pageants because she has neither a lack of talent nor awkward looks.  Understandably, she did quite well in them.  I remember, though, when Miss Teen South Carolina offered the guffaw inducing answer to her question.  Can't remember the question and can't remember the answer, probably because it made no sense.  But I saw an interview with her later and it didn't seem to diminish her spirit. 

The Miss USA pageant was on recently and I watched about a nanosecond of it.  Enough to realize that most of the hair colors and boobs were fake.  And the fact that this is rewarded is a bit disturbing.  Inevitably it came time for the infamous question and answer.  I'm convinced they give the girls an idea of what the questions might be so they can be somewhat prepared and not make a fool of themselves on live tv.  Which in retrospect may not be that poor of an idea.  However, I read the next day about answers that Miss Texas gave to her question and for which she received a loud ovation.  Miss Texas indicated that wives of politicians shouldn't stand beside their spouses who are admitting to adultery and go out and find a man who loves them.

Well.  Isn't that high and mighty of her?  Given that it is the Miss USA pageant, Miss Texas has not been married.  Miss Texas has not taken an oath in front of her God to stand by her husband.  Miss Texas has not made a choice to be part of a pair that makes a whole.  Now, don't get me wrong.  Adultery is wrong.  It is a sin.  It is painful, disrespectful, and all together bad.  However, the Bible also says having lustful thoughts is considered adultery and I think you may be hard pressed to find someone that couldn't be convicted of that sin. 

I'm so tired of people saying that wives of cheating husbands (or vice versa)  are somehow inferior for choosing to stay in their marriage.  For choosing to believe that their marriage can prevail.  If anything, those spouses who choose to stay are stronger.  The easy way out is to leave without trying to work on the marriage.  To wash your hands and be absolved of having to work through it.  Understandably that is the first reaction.  But it isn't always the right one.  That is for the husband and wife to decide.  Sometimes the choice is to divorce.  And that is OK, but it is each person's right to determine what is best for them.

I implore Miss Texas, even though she is a beauty queen and will surely never have to deal with an adulterous spouse, to hesitate to judge these women.  At some point every person has to make a choice about their love with their spouse.  Because we all know that initial feeling fades and you are left with what you make of it.  You are left with a choice.  Each person has their own reasons for those decisions.

That's all.  Off my soapbox.

A letter

Dear Little Boy,
Every night I put you to sleep and marvel at how wonderful God is.  And then you usually wake up before I want you to and somehow I am still thankful.  But usually only after I make the trek to your room to get you.  Once I see you, I can't be upset.  It amazes me how much I can love someone.  You can't tell me you love me yet with words, but I know you do.

You perk up when you hear my voice.  You also do this for your daddy, but this letter is from me so we aren't going to talk about all the ways I know you love him.  I think you have a special smile just for me.  When I wake you up and whisper "Hi, stinker", you smile before your eyes are even open.  When I'm nursing you there is always a pair of feet touching me.  I have taken to removing your socks so that your skin can touch mine.  You like this a lot.  Often times you will rub your feet on my arms like it is a safety blanket.  I can tell it is comforting to you.  You want my attention on you while you are eating too.  If I look away from you; out the window or at the clock, you immediately stop nursing and look at my face, as if to get my attention back to you.  Don't worry, my attention is never gone long.  When I pick you up you have taken to resting your head on my shoulder, even if you aren't tired.  You also pull my hair.  A LOT.  I think this is so you can have my smell on your hands (or stray hair IN your hands), but I'm probably reaching a bit much on that one.

I know this time of your life passes all too quickly.  Its hard to believe that you are already 4 1/2 months old.  And I'm sad to know that I've already wasted too much time with frustration and sad feelings.  But I  know those days will happen. 

I write this for you, but just as much for me.  So I can remember these times later in life and know that I knew your love long before you could say the words.  You are the perfect addition to two lives that didn't know they needed you.

I love you,
Mommy